Everybody Hates Larry
by Squirmy McCoy
Summary: Larry feels like an outcast and ponders leaving town. Just a silly one shot.


**Disclaimer**: These characters are not mine, they belong to SyFy.

Larry sighed and rearranged his desk for the fifth time that day. As Douglas Fargo's assistant, he never had much to do other than run after his boss. Lately, he hadn't done much running around. Director Fargo seemed to be more interested in actual work instead of storming around the building, scaring scientists. That meant Larry had to stay put at his desk, where he was a target for every prankster in the building.

It was almost lunchtime. He got up and knocked on Fargo's door. "Enter," came the voice from within.

Larry stepped in Fargo's office. Everything was white, chrome, and glass. He envied Fargo for his position. Not only did he have this amazing office, even though everyone hated him, they were too scared for the most part to do anything to him. The only exceptions were Zane Donovan and Dr. Parrish.

Fargo sat at his desk, head bent over a display. Larry cleared his throat. "Director Fargo, its lunchtime. Shall I go to Café Diem and pick you up something?"

Fargo didn't even raise his head. "Blackened grouper sandwich, no mayo. And a large sparkling lemon water."

Larry nodded and backed away. "Be back in a jiff." Fargo waved him away, still not looking at him. He shut the door with a sigh and braced himself for the walk through the rotunda. He made it five steps before he was shot with something that turned out to be an unbreakable – at least from the inside - bubble. He bounced for a few seconds, trying not to show any fear, before Chief Lupo dragged the scientist responsible over to let him out. He managed to get out a "thank you" before she stalked away. Larry sighed again.

He reached his car without further incident, but inspected it for incendiaries and other obvious devices before he started it up. When he'd come to Eureka, Larry Haberman believed that it would be heaven; a true meeting of minds. Unfortunately, the meeting had happened years before he showed up and they'd decided that he wasn't going to be part of their club. He may be a genius in his mid-Western town, but in Eureka, he was average at best. He'd tried to fit in but it turned out his social awkwardness was just as bad here as it was out there.

Zane Donovan's arrival in town had been the last in a long line of painful situations. His coming would make Larry no longer the new guy; maybe then he'd be accepted into the club that was Global Dynamics. But Zane came to town like a gunslinger kicking open a saloon door and ended up saving the day immediately. Plus, he was handsome, charismatic, and a super genius that learned at the speed of light; everything that Larry wasn't. Eureka folded its arms around the new guy and left Larry still out in the cold.

Larry parked his car and walked into Café Diem. "Hello, Vincent, Director Fargo would like his usual. And I'd like a club sandwich on rye." Vincent grunted and turned away. Larry sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. Even Vincent disliked him, and Vincent liked everyone. He wished someone would invent a likeability serum.

Clutching the takeout boxes, Larry walked back to his corner. He knocked on Fargo's door, but there was no answer. He knocked again, louder, and then stuck his head in. The office was empty. He thought about putting Fargo's lunch on his desk, but the last time anyone had gone in there without permission, they were stuck in a stasis field for three hours and then reprimanded. After checking his chair for booby traps, Larry sat down and began eating his lunch.

Maybe he should think about leaving Eureka. He was going to be 30 next week and he still hadn't had any major breakthroughs. Maybe life outside would have more to offer; at least out there he'd be smarter than everybody again.

He'd finished eating and was on his third game of minesweeper when Fargo walked up to his desk. "Here's your lunch, sir," Larry stammered.

"Never mind that now. Walk with me." Larry scrambled out of his chair and hurried after Fargo. Fargo pressed the call button for the elevator and when the doors opened, he pressed 6. They rode down in silence. The doors opened and Fargo marched out with Larry in his wake, nodding at the researchers he passed. He opened the door to a lab and indicated Larry should precede him.

The lab was full of unused equipment covered with dust cloths. Fargo walked past Larry and sat down at a desk in the corner. "Larry, how long have you been with us?"

"Um, almost four years." Oh, god, it was coming. He was going to get fired before he could quit.

Fargo leaned back and crossed his arms. "Four years is a long time in a job that doesn't fit. Which is why I put in for a new assistant today. Effective immediately, I'm transferring you to section 6." Larry stared at him, mouth open. "Frankly, you've been wasting your time and talent as my lackey. It's time you went to work and used your mind to produce something to justify your paycheck. I'll have your computer and your possessions moved down here." He stood up and straightened his jacket. "Don't disappoint me," he said as he marched back out of the lab.

Larry stood frozen for a few seconds and then started jumping up and down and yelling. He had his own lab and direct orders to create something for the first time since he'd been in Eureka. He had always been the tagalong on every team he'd worked with. Well now things were going to be different. He began yanking off dust cloths.

* * *

Fargo stood outside and smiled at the sounds coming from Larry's new lab. Jo walked up behind him. "Well, that was uncommonly nice of you."

Fargo shrugged and began walking back to the elevator. "Stark did the same thing for me. I'm just passing it on. Besides, Larry is an eavesdropper and if we're going to stay safe, its better that he's not directly underfoot."

Jo chuckled. "Sounds familiar. At least you didn't give him the lab with the doomsday device."

Fargo paled. "Oh, god," he choked out as he turned and ran. Jo rolled her eyes and walked after him.


End file.
